A haircut social story is a short, personal story that walks your child through a haircut before it happens: where you go, what they will see, hear and feel, what they can do if something bothers them, and how it ends. The best ones are specific to your child and your barber or salon, describe sensory details honestly, and are read for a couple of weeks before the appointment. Below you will find what to put in the story, a sample you can adapt, and how to use it on the day.
TL;DR
Write the story in the first person ("I") from your child's point of view, mostly describing what happens, with only a few coaching sentences.
Cover the whole visit: arriving, waiting, the cape, washing, scissors or clippers, the dryer, paying, and going home.
Name the sensory parts honestly (buzzing, tickling, warm air) and give your child real choices, such as covering ears or asking for a break.
Visit the place and talk with the hairdresser before the day, then review the story together afterward and change what did not work.
Our template below is easy to edit. Swap in your own details and photos.
Table of Contents
What a haircut social story is
Social stories were developed by Carol Gray. They are personalized narratives that use written and visual cues to break a task into manageable steps. For a haircut, that means turning a vague, loud, unpredictable event into a sequence your child can picture.
The point is predictability. According to the Autism Research Institute, these stories offer predictability and clarity in complex situations and can reduce anxiety. A haircut has many hidden steps, and each one can be a surprise: a stranger touching the head, a wet spray, a tight cape, a buzzing tool near the ear.
A social story is not a script for making your child comply. It explains. It tells your child what is likely to happen and what choices exist. If you want more examples of how this format works for other situations, see our guide to social stories with examples to copy and adapt.
Why a haircut can be such a big event
To an adult, a haircut is twenty minutes in a chair. To a child with sensory sensitivities or a strong need for sameness, it can be a string of small hard things in a row:
A new place with bright lights, unfamiliar smells, and several people talking at once.
Waiting without knowing how long.
A stranger standing close and touching the head, neck and ears.
A cape or towel that feels tight or scratchy.
Water temperature, spray on the face, and shampoo smell.
Clippers that buzz and vibrate, scissors close to the ears, tiny hairs falling on the skin.
A hair dryer that is loud and blows warm air.
None of these is "just being difficult." Each one is information about what your child's body is experiencing. A good story respects that.
If you want practical tips beyond the story itself, our article on autism haircut tips that actually work covers the planning side.
What to include: the steps of the visit
You know your child best, so start with the real visit, not a generic one. Still, published haircut stories from U.S. autism organizations share a common sequence, and it is a good checklist.
The Pennsylvania Autism Society's story starts by explaining that a haircut can happen at home or in a salon. It then covers making an appointment, entering, seeing other customers, pictures, lights and styling tools, waiting for a turn, and sitting in the stylist's chair. The same story touches on the apron, hair washing, scissors or clippers, staying still, noises from dryers or clippers, and paying.
The University of Missouri Thompson Center's narrative for a chain salon adds the practical edges of the visit. It has the family wait together in the parking lot, enter through a chiming door, check in, and wait while looking at books or toys. It also includes telling the stylist what hair is wanted, asking for a different chair or for an adult to stay close, asking for a break or the bathroom, checking out, and going home.
A third example, from the Make Friends with Autism project, goes further into the salon sequence: waiting a turn, shampoo and water, a towel, moving to the haircut chair, wearing a cape, keeping hands on the lap, and having the front, top, sides and back cut.
Use these as a menu. Here is how to turn them into your own list:
Before leaving: what time, who is coming, what to bring (a favorite toy, headphones).
Arriving: the building, the door, the smell, the sound of the door.
Check-in and waiting: who talks to the front desk, what your child can do while waiting.
The chair and the cape: where to sit, what the cape feels like, where hands go.
Washing (if it happens): water, shampoo, towel.
The cut: scissors, comb, clippers, trimmer, how long it takes.
The end: brushing off hair, dryer, mirror, paying.
Going home: what happens next, and a reward or a favorite activity.
If your child does not get a wash or a dryer at the barber you use, leave those parts out. Extra steps that do not happen can confuse more than they help.
Describing sensory moments without minimizing them
This is where many stories go wrong. Saying "it doesn't hurt" or "there's nothing to be scared of" can break trust the first time the clippers feel strange. Describe what the sensation is, say it is temporary, and give an option.
The Make Friends with Autism story is a good model. It describes lights, noises, smells, water temperature, towel rubbing, cape tightness, chair movement, and the noise, vibration and warmth of clippers and dryers. It then offers things the child can do: ask to loosen the cape or change the water temperature, hold the nose, tell the stylist if something bothers them, cover the ears, or say the dryer feels too hot.
The Thompson Center version also avoids demanding one response. It notes that water spray can be declined, clippers buzz, and trimmers may tickle around the ears and neck, and that the child can tell the stylist what they need.
Some wording patterns that work:
Instead of | Try |
|---|---|
"The clippers won't bother me." | "The clippers buzz and shake a little. Some kids like it. Some do not." |
"I must sit still." | "It is easier for the hairdresser when I sit still. I can ask for a break." |
"It will be over soon." | "The haircut takes about 15 minutes. I can count the minutes on my timer." |
"The water is fine." | "The water might feel cold or hot. I can say, 'Please change the water.'" |
Only promise what you can control. If you are not sure the salon will allow breaks, call ahead and ask (more on that below).
A haircut social story template you can adapt
Here is a sample. Edit every detail to fit your child's real visit, add photos of the actual salon if you can, and change the words to match how your child talks.
Getting My Haircut
Sometimes my hair gets long. When my hair gets long, I can get a haircut. A haircut is when a hairdresser cuts my hair shorter.
On Saturday, I am going to [name of salon] with [Mom/Dad]. We will drive there in the car. We will walk in through the door. The door might make a sound.
[Mom/Dad] will tell the person at the desk my name. Then we will wait. I can look at a book or play with my [toy] while I wait. The hairdresser will call my name when it is my turn.
The salon has bright lights. It can be loud. There may be other people getting haircuts. I can wear my headphones if the noise bothers me.
I will sit in a chair. The hairdresser will put a cape around my neck. The cape might feel tight or scratchy. If it does, I can say, "Please make the cape looser."
The hairdresser will use scissors and a comb. Sometimes the clippers are used too. The clippers buzz and shake a little. They might tickle around my ears and neck. I can cover my ears if the buzzing is too loud. I can tell the hairdresser, "I need a break."
Little hairs might fall on my face and neck. That can feel itchy. The hairdresser will brush them off at the end.
When the haircut is done, the hairdresser takes off the cape. [Mom/Dad] pays. Then we go home. I can have [reward or favorite activity].
I can do this. If something is hard, I can ask for help.
Notice the voice. The Autism Research Institute notes that writing in the first or third person keeps the tone collaborative, while "you" can feel directive rather than coaching. The sample uses "I" for that reason.
The mix of sentences matters too. The American Autism Association's guidance describes effective stories as using descriptive, perspective, instructive or coaching, and affirmative sentences, with more descriptive than instructive ones. In the sample, most lines describe what will happen. Only a few tell my child what they can do.
Making the story fit your child
Templates are a start. A story that matches your child's way of understanding is the one that works.
Pictures, photos or words. A non-reader may need one photo per page, ideally of the real salon and the real hairdresser. A strong reader may prefer short paragraphs. The American Autism Association suggests creating a storybook with pictures showing what to expect.
Length. Start with six to ten short pages. Shorter is better if your child loses attention.
Language. Use the words your child uses, including their names for "clippers" or "cape."
Interests. If your child loves trains or a certain show, a favorite character can "go along." Keep the facts accurate, though.
Communication supports. If your child uses pictures, a device, or a few words, include the exact phrases they can use in the salon: "break," "stop," "too loud." Our quick start guide to communication boards shows how to set those up.
Choices. Let your child pick between two real options: which chair, which toy to bring, which reward afterward.
Spanish-speaking families can find a step-by-step version in our article Corte de pelo y autismo.
Before the haircut: practice and plan
The story is half of the preparation. The other half is the real world.
Visit the place first
The American Autism Association recommends that families visit the location, meet the hairdresser, and look for autism-friendly sessions, which are usually quieter and staffed by people trained to be more flexible. A short visit with no haircut, just walking in, saying hello and leaving, can take away a lot of the unknown. Take photos for the story.
Talk to the hairdresser
Call ahead. Tell them your child is autistic, what bothers them most, and what helps. The same guidance suggests talking with the hairdresser about the plan and asking for the least noisy tools. Useful questions:
Can we book the quietest time of day?
Can you use scissors instead of clippers, or a quieter trimmer?
Can we skip the shampoo or the spray bottle?
Is it okay to take breaks, or to stop and come back?
Can my child bring their own cape, toy or headphones?
Read the story on a schedule
Read it once a day for one to two weeks. Keep it calm, not a lecture. Stop when your child stops. If they ask questions, add the answers to the story. For dental and medical visits we suggest the same lead time, as in our guide on dental social stories.
Prepare the body
A National Health Service children's occupational therapy handout from Wales suggests that caregivers bring a familiar cape or toy, use a weighted lap or shoulder pad, or try deep pressure to the scalp, neck and shoulders before the haircut. Ask your child's occupational therapist whether these fit your child, since sensory needs differ a lot.
A calm day helps too. Avoid stacking the haircut on top of other demands. Our autism morning routine guide shows how to prep the night before, and our travel tips for families explain why one major activity a day is a good limit.
During the haircut
Bring the story. Let your child hold it in the waiting area.
Bring supports. A favorite toy, a show on a tablet, or a sensory toolkit. The American Autism Association lists these as helpful supports during the haircut.
Stay close. Stand where your child can see you.
Honor the break request. The first time your child says "stop" and it is respected, they learn the story told the truth. That trust is what you are building for every future haircut.
Accept partial progress. If you only get the front trimmed today, that is a step. Finish another day.
If full haircuts are very hard, gradual exposure may help. A 2020 study of students with autism tested haircut tolerance using a graduated hierarchy, starting with tolerating the clippers' presence and moving to longer contact with the scalp and hair. A behavior analyst or therapist can help you set up something similar.
After the haircut: review and revise
Social stories should be reviewed and revised as they are used so they stay practical for your child's life. After the haircut:
Reward and talk. The American Autism Association recommends rewarding the person and discussing the experience, then using that feedback to change supports for next time.
Ask simple questions. "What was the loudest part?" "What was okay?" Let your child point or choose pictures if talking is hard.
Edit the story. If the water was colder than expected, add that. If the cape was fine, say so.
Save versions. Keep the old story. Over several haircuts you will see what your child needs less of and more of.
Our perspective: honesty is the whole point
We built Autism Victory by listening to caregivers, and haircuts come up again and again. What we hear is that the story is rarely the problem. The problem is a story that says one thing while the salon does another.
So our advice is plain. Write what will really happen. Call the salon so you know. Describe the buzzing, the itch and the noise, because your child will feel them anyway, and being told the truth beforehand is what makes the next visit possible. Offer choices that you can actually deliver. Then change the story after each visit, because your child changes too.
And go easy on yourself. A haircut that ends early is not a failure. It is information. Every visit that goes a little better than the last one counts as a victory.
— Ronnie Talent
Getting more help in one place
Haircuts are one of many situations where families need a plan: the dentist, school, travel, benefits. Autism Victory is a mobile app with caregiver-focused books and audiobooks, personalized AI guidance, state-specific funding and support resources, educational videos and a caregiver community. You can ask for help drafting a story for your child's exact situation, then adjust it as you go.
Plans cost $6.95 per month or $49.95 per year, and there is a 5-day free trial. See the plans and pricing, or start at the Autism Victory home page.
FAQ
How early should I start reading the haircut story?
One to two weeks before the appointment is a common starting point. Read it once a day in a calm moment. If your child gets anxious about it, shorten the lead time or read it less often, and tell their therapist or teacher so everyone uses the same wording.
Can I use a story I found online?
Yes, as a starting point. Published stories from autism organizations are good models, but your child needs the details of their own visit, such as the real salon, the real chair and the tools that will be used. Edit the text, swap in your own photos, and change any line that does not match how your child talks.
What if my child refuses to go in?
Do not force it. Go back to a step your child can handle, such as visiting the salon without a haircut, then sitting in the chair with no cape, then a small trim. Tell the story's ending honestly: "We went home." Progress in small pieces is normal, and a therapist can help you plan the steps.
Should the story say the haircut won't hurt?
It is better to describe what it feels like: buzzing, tickling, pulling, warm air. Then say what your child can do about it. If your child has ever felt pain at a haircut, such as from a pulled hair or a hot dryer, acknowledge that and include how to tell the hairdresser.
Is a social story enough on its own?
Usually it works best with other supports: a visit beforehand, a hairdresser who understands, sensory tools, and a calm day. If haircuts cause intense distress, talk with your child's pediatrician, occupational therapist or behavior analyst about a plan tailored to your child.
Sources
Preparing Children on the Autism Spectrum for Haircuts (American Autism Association)
Getting a Haircut: Social Story (Pennsylvania Autism Society)
Getting a Hair Cut at Cost Cutters or Supercuts Salon (University of Missouri Thompson Center)
Sensory Strategies for Hair Cuts (Aneurin Bevan University Health Board, NHS Wales)
Teaching students with autism spectrum disorder to tolerate haircuts (PubMed, 2020)
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